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After WLS: Goodbye Self-Loathing! Hello Self-Loving!
You won't believe what happened to me today! I was getting ready for work and saw myself naked in the full-length mirror and I didn't hate what I saw! I actually gave myself an unrehearsed slightly passive self-compliment "You don't look bad today." The reason this is monumental is because most of the time when I look in the mirror I do not like what I see and I give myself harsh criticism. I suppose after years of self-loathing that it is more comfortable to degrade my appearance than to appreciate it. Many patients report hyper-judging their bodies after weight loss; it seems the thinner we get the more judgmental we are of our bodies. These days I'm critical of thighs that seem a bit jiggly and some very unattractive cottage cheese dimples on my rear end. Loathing these body parts keeps me from appreciating a thin waist, toned arms or those curious collarbones that were in hiding for so many years. Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental image many victims of anorexia nervosa have that tells them they look fat, even when they are emaciated. Morbidly obese people and bariatric patients can suffer from body dysmorphia as well. One reader, ThereseD, posted this message regarding body perception: "Body Dysmorphia is REAL! Over five years after my open RNY gastric bypass and I got hit with it again just last night, when I was cleaning out my closet. My daughter commented that my new shirt, which I was so proudly placing at the front, was too big and needs to go in the "go" pile. I checked the label and sure enough, it said "Large". Following my revision surgery of April 18, 2005, I still have my bandages and I'm probably wearing a size 4 Petite . . . and still I put on a smart and stylish new top in a size that's just too big for me! Oops!" When we were morbidly obese our emotional coping mechanisms kicked in and many of us were able to convince ourselves we really weren't that big. It is emotionally kinder to avoid body criticism. The whole issue of obesity seems hopeless. In fact, many morbidly obese patients will say they see themselves normal sized. That is until rude moments remind them they are not normal sized: a skinny chair, a turnstile, a bathroom stall, a flight of stairs, a photograph. This false perception is a subconscious coping strategy to protect us from the brutal truth, the truth about how big morbidly obese really is. After surgery, there is a tendency for the body dysmorphia to reverse. Before surgery we denied how big we were, after surgery we judge ourselves critically - like the anorexic - and fail to see an honest reflection. One woman, down from size 24 to size 10 wrote, "I feel fat daily. I never felt this at 248 pounds - I saw a thinner person in the mirror than I see now. I look at my size 10 jeans and they look like tents. I don't feel as attractive as I did when I was heavy. I don't understand it," she continued, "but I think it has to do with learning to accept yourself fat so you didn't see all the fat. Now I just have to learn to accept myself as thinner." It has been suggested that dressing in stylish clothes that fit is one way to beat the body blues. Another idea, as Therese suggested, is having a bystander who will be honest about our appearance. Therese wrote, "My daughter's the number one person I go to, when I need to cure the myopic view of myself that I've developed." I wish I knew what magic happened this morning that I accepted and appreciated my own body. If I could package that magic I would personally mail it to every reader of LivingAfterWLS.com - we ALL deserve to love and appreciate ourselves. It's time for the self-loathing to end and the self-appreciation to begin. Kaye Bailey � 2005- All Rights Reserved Kaye Bailey is a weight loss surgery success story having maintained her health and goal weight for 5+ years. An award winning journalist, she is the author and webmaster of http://www.livingafterwls.com and http://www.livingafterwls.blogspot.com Fresh & insightful content is added daily, check in often. To subscribe to the LivingAfterWLS monthly newsletter "You Have Arrived" click on http://www.livingafterwls.com and enter your details in the subscription box.
MORE RESOURCES: The Labor-Boosting Potential of Weight-Loss Drugs Bloomberg.com Scientists are discovering something surprising about obesity in teenagers - Duke School of Medicine Scientists are discovering something surprising about obesity in teenagers Duke School of Medicine ‘Deliberately false’ and ‘outdated’: Eli Lilly slammed with lawsuit over weight-loss drug ads MassLive Video Novo Nordisk, Eli Lilly in legal battle over weight-loss drugs ABC News - Breaking News, Latest News and Videos GLP-1 Weight-Loss Drug Demonstration Begins July 2026 Medicare Rights Center Column | The benefits of GLP-1s for women no one is talking about The Washington Post In the age of GLP-1s, plastic surgeons face a new reality Duke School of Medicine Postpartum weight loss may be easier when eating habits fit a mother’s routine, study finds The University of Alabama at Birmingham GLP-1 ad war spills into court as Novo Nordisk alleges Eli Lilly ignores science The Washington Post GLP-1 Use Hits Record High as Medicare Opens Access to Weight-Loss Drugs Infectious Disease Advisor What to know about weight loss drugs ABC7 Chicago Should you microdose GLP-1 drugs for weight loss? The Economist Study Finds Some Medical Spas Still Selling Compounded Weight-Loss Drugs From Pharmacies With Regulatory Concerns University of Colorado Anschutz WellSpan Weight Management Patient Loses 57 Pounds, Improves Mobility Franklin County Free Press GLP-1 weight-loss drugs may also reduce binge eating News-Medical Noom pushes for lasting weight loss marketingreport.one New study links weight loss jabs to huge drop in alcohol-related hospital admissions The Independent Does intermittent fasting work? Harvard Health Telemedicine company touted by Novo Nordisk stressed profits over patient safety, ex-workers say STAT Novo Nordisk is suing Eli Lilly over ads it says mislead consumers on weight loss drug efficacy qz.com Urology pearls The Mining Journal - 30-Day High-Protein Diabetes-Friendly Meal Plan for Weight Loss, Created by a Dietitian - EatingWell Actress Rebel Wilson pairs GLP-1s and healthy habits to lose weight 'for keeps' in new Noom campaign Fierce Pharma Rosie O'Donnell says she wants to fall in love again after 60-pound weight loss and $90k facelift HOLA Optimal Body tackles hidden barriers that block weight loss success WMAR 2 News Baltimore More Americans Than Ever Are Taking Weight-Loss Drugs The New York Times Weight-loss wars: Why Novo Nordisk is suing Eli Lilly Yahoo Finance Berkley woman's 112-pound weight loss journey Taunton Daily Gazette Rebel Wilson's 'Year of Health': What her weight-loss journey teaches us about changing habits without ch The Times of India |
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